


Hatred

by singmetosleep (ohmyheichou)



Category: Naruto
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-28
Updated: 2018-04-28
Packaged: 2019-04-29 05:01:00
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,129
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14465574
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ohmyheichou/pseuds/singmetosleep
Summary: No matter what, Sasuke could never hate his brother.





	Hatred

The old boards of the dock creaked and groaned under Sasuke's feet. He hesitated, not particularly wanting to get wet, but the wood didn't give under him. It had been a long time since he had come here, and even longer since anyone had bothered to check on the dock.

 

As usual, there was no one around. This lake was close to the Uchiha Compound, which naturally meant that it was on the outskirts of the village. It had been rare to see anyone at this lake, unless they were a young Uchiha practicing their very first Katon jutsu. Children had sometimes come to play, but now they whispered to each other about ghosts and only came here if dared to do so. Sasuke hated that, hated the reminder that he was the only one left, but he was grateful that no one else came here. This lake and this dock held bittersweet memories, and he liked to be alone here, alone with his memories.

 

Sasuke walked to the edge of the dock and sat down, letting his legs dangle in the air, his feet skimming the water. He leaned forward and stared at his reflection. His face was pale, almost unnaturally so, but that was normal for his clan. His eyes were shadowed, his face tired from lack of sleep, but that was normal - for him. He looked at the cast on his wrist. That was not normal.

 

_"Foolish otouto," his brother intoned. His grip on Sasuke's arm tightened until there was a sharp snap that left Sasuke gasping in pain._

The words were distorted in the water, but he knew what they said. There was a message from Sakura, of course - "get better soon Sasuke-kun!" - and messages from people he had known in the Academy. He heard that they - himself included - were being referred to as The Rookie Nine now, because they had all entered and survived the Chuunin Exams as rookies. Sasuke found this funny, because he had been the Rookie of the Year, and he of all people knew what a meaningless title that was.

 

 _His brother leaned in and whispered, "You are still so_ weak _, Sasuke."_

The messages all hoped that he would get well soon. No one commented on his weakness, the weakness that had gotten him a broken wrist, and no one admonished him to train harder so that he could become stronger. They were, after all, just acquaintances. Sasuke knew that his father would have had something to say. Or perhaps not. Maybe he would have just folded his arms and shaken his head, because that would have been enough for Sasuke to know how disappointed he was.

 

Even without his father's censure, Sasuke knew what he was. A disappointment.

 

_"Oh, Sasuke," his brother said, sighing in mock disappointment. "What would our parents think if they saw you now?"_  


His father, no doubt, would have lectured him about the honor and duty of the clan.

As the last of the Uchiha, Sasuke has a very specific duty. He must slay his parents' murderer. That would have been no hardship; Sasuke had loved his parents, even if he never felt that his father loved him in return. Avenging them would be his pleasure. It didn't matter who the murderer was, because all bonds paled in the face of the bonds of family. And that was the problem, of course, the cruel irony of the situation. The murderer was his brother, someone who was also tied to him by blood. Does duty to one's parents supersede the bond between brothers?

In theory, yes. The tragedy lay in this fact: Sasuke had always loved his brother best. Even now, Sasuke was not sure how much he really hated his brother. He trained to kill him, and everybody around him believed that he did so out of hatred. Why wouldn't they? It should have been easy, so very easy for Sasuke to hate his brother. No one realized how hard it actually was. The truth was that he was obligated to hate Itachi, and so he did. 

 

_"It's because you lack hatred, otouto." His brother's hands left his neck and arm and instead began to wander down his body, down to more_ _...intimate places. "Shall I be a good nii-san and give you another reason to hate me?"_

There was a reason Sasuke was here at this dock. This was where he was recognized as a man of the Uchiha Clan, the same dock where he had finally gained some measure of his father's approval, even if that was only because Itachi had recently fallen out of favor. This was the same dock where he had sat with his brother in the summer, eating popsicles and splashing each other playfully. This dock reminded him of the reasons he had always had to resent Itachi, as well as the reasons why he had never actually resented him.

_Sasuke wanted to scream, wanted to push his brother away, because he knew this was sick and wrong. He opened his mouth to protest, but all_ _that came out was a tortured moan. He grasped at his brother's back desperately and pretended he couldn't see Naruto's horrified face over Itachi's shoulders._

Now more than ever, Sasuke had reason to hate Itachi, to want him dead. His brother had...had raped him. Violated him. Any normal person would hate their rapist. Any normal person would hate the person who had taken away all of his innocence - first by slaughtering his parents and then by raping him. The horrible, shameful,  _disgusting_ truth was that Sasuke still did not - could not - hate his brother.

_Jiraiya stopped in front of him, but Sasuke did not look up._ _He knew what he must look like, and he did not want to see the disgust on the man's face. Jiraiya sighed, the sound loud in the silence of the hallway. "Let's get you cleaned up."_

 

Sasuke stared at his reflection, and, as he had so many times before, he imagined that it was his brother. He liked to imagine Itachi as he had been - the small smiles he gave Sasuke, the gentle way he helped Sasuke with his kunai, the warmth of his body when he picked Sasuke up. But the warmth of Itachi's body made Sasuke think of other things, now, and so today he imagined Itachi as he had seen him so recently.

 

_His older brother stared back at him with unblinking red eyes and said, " **Hate me. Resent me** **.** "_

 

Sasuke gazed at the face so like his own and leaned in, until he could feel Itachi's breath against his neck, until he could feel the waves lapping at his face.

 

"I can't."

 

He closed his eyes, and slipped into the lake.

 


End file.
